Election Stress

Do you have election jitters? We are in strange times with our political system and many people I see in my practice have free floating anxiety about how this is all going to play out. Election stress can significantly impact relationships,especially when couples hold differing political views. Political differences can challenge a couple’s ability to maintain harmony, particularly during high-stakes elections. The stress associated with elections can amplify emotional tension, leading to conflicts and misunderstandings. Here are some of the dynamics at play when election stress affects couples with different political views:

Emotional Investment in Political Ideologies 

Politics is often deeply personal, tied to a person’s values, identity, and worldview. When a couple holds opposing political views, election periods can highlight those differences in a way that feels threatening to each partner’s core beliefs. 

• Personal Beliefs as Identity: Political beliefs are often rooted in personal experiences, family background, and social issues that matter deeply to individuals. When one partner feels strongly about a particular candidate or policy, any opposition can feel like a personal rejection of their values.

• Heightened Emotion During Elections: During election seasons, the media and public discourse tend to intensify political messaging, which can heighten emotional responses to political discussions. Couples who disagree politically may feel that their partner’s views are not only different but also incompatible with their vision for the future. This can create an “us vs. them” mentality,which may lead to tension and arguments.

Communication Breakdowns 

Political disagreements can lead to communication challenges, particularly if partners do not feel safe discussing their views without fear of judgment or conflict. The stress of an election may exacerbate existing communication issues, leading to misunderstandings or emotional withdrawal. 

• Avoidance of Political Topics: In some cases, couples may avoid discussing politics altogether to keep the peace, but this avoidance can lead to deeper frustration and resentment if one or both partners feel silenced. Over time, avoiding difficult conversations may erode trust and openness in the relationship.

• Escalation of Arguments: Political discussions can easily escalate into heated arguments if one or both partners feel defensive. When each person is emotionally charged and passionate about their political stance, it becomes difficult to listen to the other without interrupting or becoming hostile. This escalation can quickly turn political disagreements into personal attacks, damaging the relationship.

Cognitive Dissonance and Relationship Strain

When partners hold fundamentally different political views, they may experience cognitive dissonance — the mental discomfort of holding conflicting values. This can create an internal conflict for individuals who want to maintain a loving relationship while also feeling that their partner’s political views are morally or ethically troubling. 

• Moral and Ethical Conflicts: Political differences can sometimes feel like a clash of moral values, particularly when one partner supports policies that the other sees as harmful or unjust. These differences can lead to feelings of betrayal or disappointment, especially if one partner feels that their values (such as equality, fairness, or justice) are being disregarded.

• Disillusionment with Partner: Cognitive dissonance can also manifest as disillusionment with a partner’s character. A person may begin to question how they view their partner if they strongly disagree on important political issues. For example, one partner might think, “How can I be with someone who supports that candidate or policy?” 

Election-Related Stress Amplifies General Relationship Stress 

Elections are inherently stressful periods, especially in a polarized political climate. Couples already dealing with everyday relationship challenges, such as financial pressures, parenting responsibilities, or career stress, may find that election stress adds another layer of tension. 

• External Stressors: The anxiety surrounding an election’s outcome, particularly in close or contentious races, can spill over into the couple’s personal life. External stressors such as social media, news coverage, anddiscussions with friends or family can exacerbate election-related anxiety, making it more difficult for couples to separate political stress from relationship dynamics.

• Fatigue and Emotional Drain: Election fatigue, caused by the constant bombardment of political ads, news, and debates, can drain emotional energy. Couples may feel worn out by the ongoing political discussions, making it harder to address their relationship issues with the patience and care needed to resolve conflicts.

Finding Compromise and Understanding 

While political differences can be challenging, many couples find ways to navigate these disagreements and maintain a healthy relationship. The key to resolving election-related stress lies in open communication, empathy, and mutual respect for each other’s views. 

• Active Listening and Respectful Dialogue: One of the most important tools for managing political differences in a relationship is active listening. This means allowing each partner to express their views without interruption or judgment, and trying to understand the emotional and personal reasonsbehind their stance.

• Agreeing to Disagree: Some couples find it helpful to acknowledge that they will not change each other’s minds about certain political issues. Instead, they focus on finding common ground and respecting each other’s right to have different opinions. Agreeing to disagree can help reduce the pressure to win arguments and preserve the relationship’s emotional bond. 

• Focusing on Shared Values: Despite political differences, most couples share common values that brought them together in the first place, such as love, trust, and mutual support. By focusing on these shared values, couples can reaffirm their commitment to each other and navigate election stress with a sense of unity, even if they vote differently.

Setting Boundaries 

Setting clear boundaries around political discussions can help couples avoid escalating conflicts during election periods. For example, they might agree not to discuss politics during certain times (like dinner or family events) or to limit political conversations to a certain timeframe.

• Limiting Media Exposure: Couples can also work together to limit their exposure to election-related news and social media. Reducing the amount of time spent consuming political content can help lower election stress and prevent political discussions from overwhelming the relationship. 

By communicating openly, respecting each other’s opinions, and finding ways to manage external stressors, couples can navigate election periods while maintaining a strong emotional connection. Setting boundaries, practicing empathy, and focusing on shared values are key strategies to help couples weather the storm of political differences and come out stronger on the other side.

Does your relationship need support through this election season? Reach out—we’ll find you a good fit at Riviera Therapy.